I never

i never claimed to be a poet,
not when the words are so unstable.

they rarely come in rhyming schemes
of a and b that aren't that useful,
and often times i'm walking a beam
that's between understanding and remorseful.

i never called myself a dreamer,
not when i've left a trail of broken dreams.

ideas always seem to take flight
but later crash to the ground,
and i know for a fact that memories...
are the hardest thing to bear at night.

i never said i was a lover,
not when fighting has destroyed me.

swords never strike but i'm left bleeding
covering wounds with a flimsy band-aid,
which i'm half convinced will fall off
i just don't know when...

i never claimed to full of faith,
not when i gave up on god.

i did believe all those years ago
praying never seemed to do much good,
and instead of killing me...
he made me live a little longer.

i never claimed to be stable,
not when i see monsters in the darkness.

they come for me
telling me to hurt you,
messing up my writing so i don't write,
and showing me an eternal loneliness...
that promises everything.